Random: Tomato Soup Almost Slaughtered My Throat.

I was starving and feeling a bit run-down so I thought I should have some tomato soup. Anna wasn’t around as she was out on a date, and Will was on a work trip. Making a meal out of tinned tomato soup can’t be that hard, I thought.

Found a Heinz tin of tomato soup in a cupboard. Operated the automatic tin opener okay. Got a sauce pan out. Chunked the contents of soup tin into the sauce pan. Stirred a bit. Dipped my index finger in to check whether it was ready. Got a bowl and a spoon out. Dipped my finger in again. It was warming up. Cool beans. Waited some more. Dipped in again. Hot enough not to make the skin slide off my finger. Turned off the oven knob. Poured the soup into the bowl. Sat and picked up the spoon. Not scathing. Awesome.

I felt really proud. I’d made an unsupervised meal without screwing up. How awesome is that? It was only soup, granted, but a meal is still a meal. I felt really chuffed. I really did.

After a few spoonfuls of tomato soup, my throat started to hurt. I can’t quite explain. My throat just felt oddly parched. Regardless, I had some more spoonfuls, but it soon became unbearable. I needed a glass of water. Had some. On the way back to kitchen table, I checked the tin to make sure it was tomato soup. It was. Strange. Had more spoonfuls until I couldn’t take it any more. It was killing my throat. I didn’t know what I did wrong. It was simply inedible. So while I poured the remaining soup down our kitchen sink drain, Anna came in. She was surprised, but quickly congratulated me for making a successful meal. Rather dejectedly, I stated it wasn’t a success because the soup made my throat hurt.

As I started to wash up, she wandered over to the kitchen bin and peered inside to look at the tin. She asked, “Did you have water or milk in your soup?” I didn’t realise I was supposed to. Whilst pointing at the tin label, she gently pointed out: “See this? Condensed Soup. For this, you need to add water or milk.”

Bugger.

(In my defence, ‘Condensed Soup’ on the label was hard to spot/read/catch. It’s in handwritten font and it’s the smallest on the label. Granted, it’s an excuse, but it’s the excuse I’m sticking with.)